Dearest Readers,
If you happen to be spending time in the company of someone who is in a bad mood what do you do? Do you immediately ask her what is the matter? Do you try to compensate for his grumpiness by becoming overly cheery? Do you act like nothing is wrong and behave normally? Maybe you turn sour, too.
No doubt I’ve responded in “all of the above” ways over the course of my life. I’m certainly sensitive enough to venture the question, “Are you okay?” but I’m also anxious enough to turn into a Chatty Cathy in order to lighten the situation. Often I will choose avoidance. It’s the easy way out. Or I’ll take on the negative energy and ‘bang’ I’m in a bad mood also. I’m a good codependent that way.
But I’ve changed. Or, more aptly, I’m constantly changing. Willing to try the new behaviour. Willing to do it differently. Willing to evolve.
I was recently dining with a couple of friends, one of whom was behaving in a most sullen manner. I didn’t feel it was my place to say, “What’s the matter?” although in hindsight I probably could have. My anxiety was rising steadily and I could feel the yakity-yakker itching to get out. I could also feel my anger brewing and foresaw myself joining my friend on his gloomy island of despair.
But I didn’t feel despairing. I felt grounded. So why should I go there? I shouldn’t.
So guess what I did? I breathed, relaxed, and I let go. Let him be. I don’t have to take him on. Let him have his feelings. I don’t have to take them on either. Perhaps his own anxiety is causing him grief. I’ve been there. I’m not there now. I can be present with him in his state without altering my own.
Kind of a miracle. Kind of radical. The temptation to somehow alter the situation was overwhelming. “I’m uncomfortable and I gotta make this different. I can’t handle this I gotta change it.”
No, I don’t. Breathe, relax, let go.
It wasn’t long before this man’s own spirits lifted and the atmosphere changed. Not my doing, folks. I was too busy Be-ing.
Inspiring Message of the Day: Today I will not let another person’s mood alter my own. I will stay grounded in my own Power unswayed by what is happening around me. I will breathe, I will relax and I will let go.
