Dearest Readers,

How are you doing? Hard times they come again. I hope you are finding moments of connection to remind you of Life’s beauty, profundity and depth.

In hard times, acronyms help. There’s QTIP (Quit Taking Things Personally), which is useful when I am feeling hurt by someone else. And there’s PAUSE (Postpone Action Until Serenity Emerges) for the times when I want to fix a difficult situation or force a solution. You see How Acronyms Work?HAW!

I recently came up with my own acronym when I had the opportunity to do a work-presentation on self-care: FUDJ (to be employed when you want to say the other F-word.)

Here’s the breakdown:

F is for Faith and Fun.

Everyone has faith in something. For some, it’s God or a Higher Power. For others, it’s the arrival of Spring or a dear friend who is always there. How could you allow your own unique faith to energize you? Or to console or comfort you?

And … are you having fun yet? If not, why not? What did you find fun as a kid? What if you could do more of that? Try bringing more fun into your life.

U is for Understand.

How could ā€œunderstandingā€ soften the edges? Understanding toward ourselves: I’m doing the best I can with what I have at any given time. Toward others: they are, too. How about Understanding the Universe? (That’s a double U.) Try zooming out and looking at the Big Picture to understand that we are here for only a little time and that we don’t know everything.

D is for Decide.

I don’t have a lot of power to change the world but I do have the power to change my perception, my thinking, and my reactions. If things are affecting me negatively, I can decide to see things differently. I can look through a lens of gratefulness, or compassion or acceptance. That is power I do have.

J is for Judgment and Joy.

I’ve learned that when I am judging others I’m often just trying to feel safe. It is a way to feel like I have control. And when I am in judgment I’m obviously not in Joy. So where do you find joy? That’s a tough one for me. Joy has been elusive. But it is possible to cultivate it. So I try to do that. And I take care of the part of me that doesn’t feel safe. Try moving from judgment to joy, when/if possible.

If you are struggling in these hard times and find yourself saying FUC* it, try saying FUDJ it instead. And if it makes you think of real fudge, good. Let sweetness prevail.

From the trenches,

Celia